Rest In Peace Bruce

A week ago Tuesday my best friend called me unexpectedly during the day. She left a message for me to please call her so I did. I was expecting her to tell me some wonderful news, especially since she opened with "Are you sitting down?"

Unfortunately she did not have wonderful news, but rather heartbreaking news instead. A man named Bruce with whom DH worked had died. On a business trip. In China. He was out eating dinner with his company's Chinese representative and just slumped over from what I understand. DH's cousin, who was Bruce's best friend and co-VP of the company, had to go over that morning and tell Bruce's wife what had happened.

The past ten days we've been getting our information piecemeal from other relatives of DH's who also work for the company (it's a family owned business). Bruce's widow is living what is probably everyone's worst nightmare. Her 43 year old husband died unexpectedly halfway around the world. Either one or two autopsies were performed. The first was inconclusive, so either a second autopsy was performed, or they just guessed and listed "heart failure" as the cause of death. They needed a cause in order to file the insurance claim. We later learned that Bruce's widow won't have the benefit of having a stateside autopsy performed because the Chinese do not embalm. Bruce is being cremated in China and will then be shipped back here. The funeral will be mid next week.

I simply cannot imagine how awful it must be for his widow to not have the opportunity to have her questions about his death answered in a domestic autopsy. Nor can I imagine receiving a box of ashes and having to trust that they are those of my loved one. I am so accustomed to seeing open caskets at wakes that it gives me closure. Bruce's widow and their four children have been robbed of that. I'm so terribly sad about the entire situation.

DH will be attending the funeral next week and I am glad that he will be going to it. I'm happy to know that I married a man who cares enough to travel so far to pay his respects to the grieving family of a friend and coworker.

Rest in peace Bruce. We'll keep your wife and kids in our prayers.